Where have all the big dreams gone?

29 Jul

This article is part of the series “31 blogs in 31 days” during July 2017 on howtofab.com.

There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. (Oscar Wilde)

As I am lying in the sun, contemplating life from my mum’s terrace, happily fed and watered, I realise that the past weeks and months have gone pretty much how I had planned and hoped (apart from all the rain that has kept Berlin and myself from having a real summer). I only had a few things I wanted or didn’t want to do, and I think I can safely say I did / didn’t do them all. I must be thrilled, right? Life going to plan! All boxes ticked! Yeah, well, hm….I guess so.

My life right now is far from being a tragedy, but I know I am keeping it at a certain “mid-range” level. I am not shooting for the extraordinary nor for the most basic. Somewhere in the middle. And that’s ok for now, but I am realising that that also only yields certain results. That life without peaks and troughs is actually a bit boring. I am definitely playing it too safe right now to win or lose big. I am not even really dreaming super big. I totally had this coming – while I may have the ability to design my life in a pro-active way (which for July meant un-plugging to the max), I have at least the same ability to get impatient quite quickly and furiously. And impatience is absolutely starting to whisper into my ears again.

Going back to the potential trouble with expectations, it’s probably not a bad strategy to keep most expectations and plans achievable but at the same time life needs a few out-of-this-world-crazy dreams and ideas. The sparks that get our body trembling, the butterflies having a party in our stomach, the stuff so outrageously bananas that there is no chance in hell we would even want it to become true as reality could never match the bonkersness (bonkersity?) of our wildest dreams. And if it did, it might be disastrous!

We all need a couple of things in life that are out of our reach – that keep us going, that make us stretch ourselves. Getting everything we dream of can be a recipe for deep unhappiness and sloth.

While July was/is the month of relaxation, winding down and refuelling the tank, I am truly hoping that August will be the month for igniting the sparks again, for new energies, for new and crazy dreams – and not the ones I could feasibly make come true. The ones that are like the sun, beautiful and magical from a distance but too hot to get close to.

Picture: Mikhail_Y via Pexels / CC0

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