I am a Jelly Donut aka Ich bin ein Berliner

2 Jan

So then, I have officially arrived in Berlin and I am now sitting in my quirky little flat (with the world’s smallest bathroom) and more Apple devices around me than can be morally justified. Steve Jobs better be smiling down at me.

What an eventful month. The past couple of weeks in the UK were highly dramatic with dinners, parties, good-byes, tears, love-you-lots and love-you-mores. Looking back I can happily say that I managed to see 94% of my dearly beloved friends for hugs and cuddles and totally exhausted this whole leaving thing to its emotional and physical maximum. The actual moment of leaving (i.e. closing the door to my flat and getting into my dads car) was traumatic to say the least and during the drive to the ferry I wasn’t much more than a shattered, sobbing blob on the back seat. But things started to look very bright straight away. As we drove towards the port, there was this ridiculously perfect looking rainbow in the sky and the radio played “She’s amazing” which, I chose to believe, was my very own send-off from the gods of England. But I was absolutely broken at that moment and could not even speak. What I think happened was that my body shut down and rebooted itself just in time for a very luxurious suite on the ferry with free champagne and wine all night. Daddy done good. I’ve never quite understood how my brain managed to deal with being bi-lingual / -emotional / -brainial, but when I regained my sanity (after 5 glasses of bubbly), I realised that I was fully restored in German mode which makes me think that it’s not too dissimilar to having 2 different operating systems running on the same machine. I won’t make the obvious Mac / PC comparison as we all know which country would lose out, but the second I left UK ground, I started to think (and feel, which will make no sense to most people) in German again.  How. Very. Odd.

Anyway, Christmas was lovely and I thoroughly enjoyed catching up with old friends and family. Word of my return had spread and everybody seemed genuinely happy  (or at least polite enough to disguise the opposite) and the fact that my local pub is usually open until 4am and has a somewhat liberal take on the good old smoking ban meant that many an evening was spent putting the world to right in a hellishly delicious environment.

My brother very very kindly offered to drive me to Berlin a couple of days ago, so we got some quility bro/sis time and had a first stab at checking out the many lovely restaurants / pubs / bars in my area, which I must say is really really cool. I know that Berlin is eekingly stylish, but I was very pleased to find that I had managed to get myself settled in an area that instantly starting feeling like home.

New Years was amazing, being out until 5am in Kreuzberg (where the really cool cats are) with an old friend who had spontaneously decided to come and visit. Midnight was spent on top of a hill amongst hundreds of other cool cats overseeing all the fireworks in the city and there were many (and I mean MANY) small local fireworks, which made phone calls somewhat difficult. We then wandered and danced through the streets and fell from one bar to the next, at one point buying beer at a phone shop which had been transformed into a HipHop bar for the night. Decided not to ask too many questions.

Today was ‘get stuff done Day’ with registrations, new bank account, mobile phone etc. which I must say I was somewhat daunted by. But Germans seem to have become a bit nicer over the years and nobody started yelling at me for not exactly knowing what I was supposed to do. Progress. Tomorrow is my first day at Sourcefabric and I am really, really looking forward to it.

Looking a level deeper I am very happy right now. As heart wrenching as it was saying good-bye, I know I’ve made the right decision. I absolutely love Berlin so far, spent yesterday just wandering about some of the popular areas and realized just how much I love the vibe of this place. Had my first ‘Currywurst’ and my first local beer, which might have been the official start of my ‘Berlin (Opposite of) Bucket List’ – if anybody can think of a good name, please let me know. I am also glad I celebrated leaving the way I did. I am sure some people got annoyed by yet another leaving thing, but I don’t care. The Bucket List was great fun and although 5 months was a very long time to plan and execute my move, at least it meant I had enough time and energy to spend some quality time with people. I’m still a bit in an ‘in between’ state of mind, as there is no routine to what I am doing here, but from the pit of my stomach I am very relaxed, content, grounded and in anticipation of a great year. I’ve not really had the space to reflect on this last month properly and I have not cried once since the fateful ferry. Newcastle seems extremely far away right now, but I am sure things will settle and as I am back online now, I am hoping to make the most of Skype to keep in real touch with my lovelies. I would hate to think that I am fading into the back of their minds and hearts just because I now live somewhere else. And even if I do, I am just going to find myself some new hip friends, dye my hair again and post tons of pictures of my ubercool Berlin life on Facebook and Twitter to make people see what they’re missing. Ha

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One Response to “I am a Jelly Donut aka Ich bin ein Berliner”

  1. Lynds January 3, 2012 at 12:22 am #

    Yeah baby, go blonde again ; ) miss you. Skype soon and see you in Berlin. Can’t Fu**king wait xxxx

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