Wheat the F*%k

26 May

I can not tell you how relieved I am to be writing my fourth blog right now. After all we were living in a state of mad danger last week.  My 30th birthday and Rapture on the same weekend was quite something, but as it turns out we’re all safe. Phew. Everybody relax. Until I turn 40.

Anyway, this little blog is about something completely different: A life without wheat. Yeah, that’s as exciting as it’s gonna get, so feel free to check out now. I am not gonna quote wikipedia or other dubious statistics though if that helps.

I gave up wheat about 5 months ago and dear me, what a difference it has made. After living with a ‘problem tummy’ for 15 years it was the last thing to try out and I actually didn’t have high hopes. I had seen a good dozen ‘specialists’ over the years and had countless ‘procedures’ done without any result. IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) was the only actual diagnosis I was given at one point but nobody knew how to treat it so I was left as clueless as I was before.

With problem tummy I mean being bloated all the time, cramps (that have caused me to pass out in the past), digestion problems, feeling as if I was carrying a bag of stones, lethargy and sometimes being really sad for no obvious reason. By the way, I did not know that the last point was related until afterwards.

I had known for a long time that bread and pasta were in the ‘bad boy’ category of food groups but I always thought that was merely a weight control thing. So anyway, one day I went shopping and spontaneously decided to go ‘wheat free’ for a few days. All I had to do was not buy anything with wheat in it – bread, pasta, pizza, noodles, biscuits. I didn’t fancy the wheat-free products in the beginning as they all looked a bit suspicious in their plastic packaging and were a bit too pricey for my liking. So off I went into the wheat-free zone and after 36 hours I was a new person. My belly had miraculously shrunk, there were no pains and I generally felt as if a veil had been lifted. My mood became much better, I felt much lighter and I started to feel comfortable in my body again.

5 months later and I have not really looked back. Of course I had my slip-ups which were immediately punished with very unproductive afternoons and sleepless nights. I try to cut wheat out as much as I can without turning into a dinner guest from hell. I also don’t go down the whole gluten-free alley as that would mean no Soy Sauce. And being heavily addicted to Sushi, that’s not an option. The wheat-free products you can buy (bread, pasta, pizza, fish fingers etc) are ok, but they do cost a lot more than normal products. Being wheat-free is not always easy, especially when a devilish hungover tells you that all you need is a McBreakfast, but the negative consequences are so obvious that I usually manage porridge or fruit or something similarly disappointing in those moments.

I don’t know whether I am allergic or intolerant and whether or not this is coeliac disease or not – but I don’t care. Not eating wheat makes me feel good – physically, emotionally and psychologically. So it’s a bit of a no-brainer to stay away from it. You can get absolutely doolaley doing too much research into the subject matter and before you know it, you have a dairy, water and air intolerance as well.

I am amazed how many people have told me that they think they have an intolerance as well. All I can say is to try it out for a few days and see what the difference is. This is not the same as no-carbs by the way, you can still eat rice and potatoes. But by all means, do not walk past an Italian restaurant when you’re hungry. Determination is one thing, but the smell of a pizza is something else!

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One Response to “Wheat the F*%k”

  1. Georgia Rakusen May 26, 2011 at 11:59 am #

    I am thinking of giving this a go. My mum is Ceoliac so living with her at present should not cause any problems for the chef. Living with Dad or boyfriend or friends in London is another issue. Of course one could always just go hungry… I think probably shopping and cooking for yourself is a prerequisite for a wheat free diet. But I’ll give it a go. I’ll let you know how I get on. Congrats to you for sticking with it!

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